Crazy Tuesday

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Yikes, I am sore this morning, but we plow ahead and do our exercise video at 6:00am. After this, I need to swig back a gallon of coffee. Today X is going to a trial Capoeira class recommended by N, one of my fellow API SA moms. We eat a light breakfast and start getting ready to drive across town to the gym. Getting ready with 4 kids requires me to start about an hour before we need to leave because, invariably, L wants to nurse, someone else needs to hit the potty before we go, I need to secure all the toys and otherwise edible things from the marauding hordes of pets,and then the actual process of loading into the mini van takes a good 15 minutes itself. Of course, you have to tack on a couple minutes for going back to the house for the things I undoubtedly miss or forget in the chaos. All said and done, we got going and were at the gym 15mins early. S decided to do the trial class with X, but will not be joining in the actual class. Spencer is extremely outgoing and gregarious, and sometimes (unconsciously) takes over. Xavier is more laid back and quite so we decided to enroll him in a martial art to give him more coordination (he tends to be clumsy) and something all his own that he can show off. He really liked it and the teacher says he is fearless and does really well for a 4yo who has never done it before - he loved doing the headstands. So, keep posted because N's 6yo son can do spinning headstands and handless cartwheels after a year of classes, so I am sure X will want to show off when he gets some moves down. S has been very understanding about not being able to take the course (after his initial disappointment) but I think it has alot to do with the fact that we had a rocking playdate with N and her three kids afterward and I promised that we will go to the park and meet up with other homeschooling families for picnic lunch after each Capoeira class.

Watched a little tv when we got home and just chilled until dinner. Went for my post-dinner walk, then spent a quiet evening with Phil.

***we are not yet a homeschool family, for those of you wondering. I am still trying to make the decision whether to let S try Kinder in the Fall or just keep him home. I am not sure his style of learning will mesh well with the public school system. Also, after looking at the Texas standards for what kids need to learn, I am not sure what I feel is important will be covered. I want to engage them in the learning process and wow them with the scope of history, geography, literature, language arts, music, art, science, math, world religion, nature, etc. Basically I want to give them a classical education which will set them up to succeed in whatever they chose to do with their lives. I am conflicted. P-Daddy is worried that I will sacrifice my life and dreams for this, but I think I can handle their dreams and mine at the same time. I love that he worries about me, but I am looking into some part-time opportunities, and think I will send my C.V. to the local community colleges and try to teach a few classes.

Maggots? Cool!

Monday April 20th, 2009

So, in my quest to get back in shape I have determined that we should wake up at 5:30am every morning and work out before the kids wake up. Then I will dance with the kids in the afternoon, walk in the evening and do some kind of yoga or meditation at night. Woke up at 5:00am to nurse the baby, and promptly went back to sleep. Screw exercising!! Okay, okay, calm down. I didn't wimp out on Day One...just got up at 6:00am instead, dragged our flabby bottoms downstairs and did the intro workout on a Leslie Sansone DVD. Jesus bleeping Christ I am out of shape. Leslie S kicked my ass. But, I sucked it up, walked to the park with the kids for a park date with AC and SRC, then did my 1.5 mile walk after dinner. In the meantime, I made cookies (yes, I know it defeats the purpose of exercising, shut up, I love raw dough) and made Jamaican Jerk chicken with mangoes and coconut rice for dinner. Ran masses of laundry, vacuumed and watched Scooby-Doo and the Monster of Mexico.

Where do the maggots come in? Well, about a week ago, I built a worm composter. I have been adding kitchen scraps to it in an effort to reduce our waste. I went out to feed the worms today and the bin was full of a seething mass of wiggly white things. I kind of grossed out about the whole thing until I learned that they were probably from soldier flies that came with the worms and were, in fact beneficial to the composting process. However, because my composter small, the maggots could have out-competed the worms, so I moved the composter away from the house, and covered the soil, worms, and food with a heavy layer of dried leaves. That is supposed to make the maggots either die or leave. It was pretty disgusting but interesting in a vomit-inducing way. Nature...gotta love her. By the way S wanted to know if Mother Nature still communes with us - after figuring out where he learned the proper usage of the term commune, I answered in the affirmative as evidenced by the beneficial relationship we have with our worms. Now if I could only convince P-Daddy that we really do need chickens......

Relaxed in the evening after having a glorious bubble bath (I love the soaker tub more than I can express in mere words - hell I love it so much I birthed a baby in it) and watched Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives. Called it a night after that so brought L upstairs and after getting her to sleep, headed that way myself.

Starting normalcy again....maybe

So, the one of you who actually reads this may have noted that I stopped blogging on February 16th. That is because Lorelei Rebecca Mary was born on February 17th, safe and healthy and always happy at home after a very fast 2hr 20min labour (exactly the same amount of time I was in labour with Cordelia and they were both born on Tuesdays).

I have a history of going into labour at about 36 or 37 weeks - I just bake my kids quick. I was totally expecting the same thing to happen this time, but should have known better. This pregnancy was very different and when I was about 28 weeks along we discovered that the baby was breech. I still decided on a homebirth for a variety of personal reasons including the fact that we had just moved from Kansas to Texas and I made an instant connection with the homebirth midwives. Well, fast forward to about 37 weeks along and I had been having Braxton-Hicks contractions for a while (which I had also never had before) and was getting very frustrated that nothing was happening. On my visit to the midwives, they checked me and discovered that because the baby had been lying breech (she flipped about then) my cervix was still in the back, but that I was already dilated and effaced. One of the midwives (Stacey) moved my cervix into the proper position, and we all prepared for the baby to come that night because even as she moved it, I dilated further. No luck. This was Saturday and by Thursday I was really getting anxious. Joi (the other midwife) came over to see what was going on and discovered that my cervix had slipped back and that I had actually closed up a bit (went from 4cms back to 3cms). I was going out of my mind and getting really irritated and irritating. I couldn't figure out what was going on, thought maybe the baby had flipped breech again, or that there was something wrong. On Monday night, I was talking to Stacey and she offered to come over the next day and bring me some homeopathics to help relieve the stress and anxiety. While she was here, she offered to check me. Turns out I had silently dilated to an 8 almost 9cms, but the baby had her arm up by her face and her elbow was stuck behind my pelvis - that is when it all came together in our minds - I had been going in to labour for probably a few weeks, hence the Braxton-Hicks, but because of her arm position she couldn't go anywhere and the labour stalled. So, Stacey said she could move the arm, but that the instant she did, my water would break because it was ready to go any moment. I called Phil home from work, and my friends Rohina and Aaron came over with their daughter, Sofia to distract the kids.

At about 3:30 pm, Stacey moved the arm, my water broke and we all got ready. I ran the tub and hopped in while the kids played downstairs, the midwives did some prep work and Phil bounced between me and people downstairs. All in all it was pretty boring - no, seriously. I was listening to music (Lullaby Baby and Puccini) for relaxation but honestly, I wasn't feeling anything. I am not sure if it was the magic power of the soaking tub, the homeopathics or whatever, but I pretty much just hung out in the tub until I finally felt like I needed to push. I still wasn't feeling much of anything, but I was starting to feel more and more, and that is when I suddenly remembered "oh yeah, this shit hurts" and I got a little scared. Luckily Phil was there and the midwives were very calming. I pushed for longer than we all expected (we expected one push and I actually tried for about 5 mins) with no results and not much pain, so the midwives checked and it turned out I had a cervical lip. Stacey tried to move it, but the pain suddenly came on full force while she was doing it and I made her stop. I hate the sensation of losing control (as I am an intense control freak) and I started to feel like I was hitting that stage. I am sure I was not at my most courageous at that moment. Joi and Stacey informed me that it was my choice to either push through the lip which could take 2 or 3 hours, or I could let them move the lip and the baby would probably be born within moments. I sucked up my fear and feelings of helplessness and let Joi move the lip. The baby came flying down and within a few pushes (which I am assured lasted no longer than 10 mins, but in my state of loss-of-control and pain, I thought was hours) the baby's head came out with Phil supporting it, then the shoulders after which he was able to lift her up for me to hold. In all, the labour took 2 hours and 20 mins and she wasd born at 5:40ish pm on February 17th, 2009. Although the kids had wanted to see the birth, Xavier and Cordelia stayed downstairs the whole time, and I kicked Spencer out in the final moments, because I didn't want him to see me completely lose control. They rushed in just seconds after her birth. Granted they were a little concerned by the red bath water (yes, there is blood during birth and it looks like a lot more in water because it gets diluted and diffused) but were so excited to find out they had a sister. Lorelei stayed in my arms and nursed until her cord stopped pulsing and then Phil cut it. After a little bit longer, Lorelei went to be weighed and measured in our room (the bathroom is en-suite so I was able to see the whole time) and then went downstairs to meet Aaron and Sofia (Rohina came up a few minutes after her birth to see her). I stayed in the tub until I delivered the placenta and then got out and into bed (I did have to go downstairs to get the baby back), while Joi gave all the kids a lesson in placentas and what they are for - Spencer and Xavier left quickly but apparently Sofia and Cordy were enthralled by the whole thing. Within the hour, I was being served beer and pizza. Homebirth rocks!!!



We have spent the last 8 weeks enjoying watching Lorelei grow from a newborn into an integral part of the family - I hardly remember a time she wasn't here. For a recount of everything that has happened between then and now, please hop over to Phil's Blog - Philanthropology - I have limited computer time these days and he is a much wittier and interesting writer than I am.

I have promised myself to start on a journey back to ME. The ME who is not just a mother, but a wife, friend, lover, teacher, and someone who can discuss topics other than baby poop. Granted I will still talk about the kids and poop but I will also try to chronicle my journey back to caring about myself, my mind, my appearance. I used to actually be hot and skinny, not jump schlumpy and well-padded. Granted I got sick, and had 4 kids, but dammit how long can I use that excuse. No More!! I refuse to concede the battle to middle age yet. I still look too young for that. Viva Me!!!!! Wish me luck!!!

For Phil - Just as a Reminder

Monday, February 16th, 2009

Bumblebee Tuna - I curse you!!!

Friday, February 13th, 2009

The addictive tune from the Bumblebee Tuna commercials will not get out of my head. Make it go away...I break out into the Yum Yum BumbleBee, BumbleBee Tuna chorus at the most inopportune times, generally prompting all three kids to break out into it as well. It is a vicious cycle - I don't even eat tuna.

For those of you who don't know, it is not actually a jingle for a commercial but comes from this Mephiskapheles song from the early 90s.

Boys Adrift

Wednesday, February 11th, 2009



I just finished reading Boys Adrift by Leonard Sax. It took me about 7 hours on and off to read because I was just so fascinated by what the authour was saying. Basically, he outlines and explains the 5 main factors leading to the rash of disengaged, underachieving boys and men in today's school systems and society - think Failure to Launch syndrome. As the mother of two (maybe three) boys this epidemic of lack of motivation and ambition concerns me greatly. I want to be prepared to help my boys become productive, happy members of society, not create little slackers who will never amount to much and will be a burden (okay, that may be a little harsh, but read the book and you will understand where this idea comes from).

When I have more time, I will outline these points and add my take on them. Right now, demands for food and drink need to take precedence.

Re-visiting Resolutions

Sunday, February 1st, 2009

So Phil re-visited his resolutions on his blog, so I decided I better do a self-check too. Here goes:

1) be more patient with the kids. Tap into my inner child and try to learn how to be silly and get into their imaginative play;

Not going so well. I am finding being a SAHM more difficult than I anticipated with the constant demand on my time (I mean seriously how many times a day do the kids and pets need to eat and pee). I timed it, I am never able to sit for more than 3 mins at a time. Very difficult when you are roughly the size of a manatee.

2) finish my dissertation requirements and defend;

Had to admit to myself and everyone else that I just can't do it all, so I have requested a year's leave. I will still work on my stuff but don't want the pressure of having to produce.

3) read more for pleasure. It really does help my mood and patience;

So far so good. I have a long queue at the library and as things become available I have Phil get them for me - the library is right next to his work. So far no fiction but some good Anthony Bourdain books and one on classical homeschool education. All the fiction I want is, apparently, popular and I am pretty far down on the "hold" list.

4) after the baby is born, exercise more. I really need to get back in shape because 4 pregnancies in 5 years has wreaked havoc on this ol' body;


I spent a good deal of time looking on Amazon for dance and exercise DVDs that I can do with the kids - they were totally into the Bollywood and Latin dance ones so I will probably get some of those and we can all groove together.

5) drive less - walk more. This may be difficult in San Antonio as things are so spread out;

Not really leaving the house that much these days, and I don't want to walk too far in case that whole "labour" thing happens.

6) get a job I like;

Think I may have found one or two things that I can do part-time in the evenings or late afternoons after Phil comes home from work or on the weekends.

7) decorate the new house and get some new furniture that is less college kid and more sturdy and family friendly (and washable);

I have a whole Powerpoint presentation filled with furniture and linens and art for each of the rooms. Now just to get that job so I can actually buy the stuff.

8) spend more time on my hobbies - knitting, crochet, I would like to learn to sew. Learn more about herbal remedies. Take up new things - I think I want to learn how to make infusions like alcohol, vinegars, oils, etc;

I mentioned to one of my new friends that I wanted to learn how to sew and thought making pillowcase dresses for Cordelia would be a good starting point. She also wants to make the dresses so she is coming over tomorrow so we can figure it out together. I am almost done with the pair of socks I am making Phil, and I made two little newborn hats (one boy, one girl) for when Bumpy arrives.

9) spend more time taking care of myself. I always put myself last and it needs to stop. I am starting to believe that to be a good wife, mother, friend, person I need to look to my own needs first;

Oh please, this isn't going to happen....total pipe dream.

10) not get pregnant again :)

Still pregnant (really I am surprised) so doing really good on this one.